I'm wrong... and I'm Finished

I lied and I apologize...
I can lie to you to everyone I know and even to myself but the truth is how you so eloquently put it. There's my confession. I am as pathetic as (you)(I) make me out to be. My cards are on the table do with them what you will. Rub them in my face. Say I told you so do what you will. Bring it up everytime we argue I don't care. I knew from the beginning that it wasn't mutual. I'm not completely delusional. This isn't the middle school version it's the adult version. I know where you stand I know where I stand. All I ask is that you don't humor me. I can't take it which is why I said friendship is all I want. There's my not so secret, secret it's yours now do with it what you will. I have a lame ass fucking school girl _ _ _ _ _.
I've decided that I am finished with people in general as well. My efforts are pointless they only leave me lacking and I am done. As selfish as it sounds I'm living for me regardless of people who could care less about me's feelings. I'm tired of walking on egg shells I'm tired of trying to save a world who won't fight for themselves. I'm tired of being hurt by people who are so consumed with their own mediocre existence that they can't see the real issues outside their front doors. People are so self righteous and self centered and selfish and I am finished caring about them. I mean it. I'm done. You want your world to be better then grow some balls and fight for what it takes to make you happy. I am finished fighting for you. You're sure as hell not fighting for me.
To the people I love. I still love you and thank you for everything. I will continue to fight for the few of you there are and you can disregard the above statements but I've got to start learning to love myself and I've got to realize I can't save everyone. Not everyone wants to be saved. A hard lesson to learn but I think I've finally got it.
I care about people entirely too much for my own good. I mean I would go without if it meant I could help someone. I have but not anymore. I'm tired of coming second. I'm tired of caring about people. I'm restless it's exhausting and it's over.
You people have fucked me over for the last time... I wish you beautiful lives filled with every happiness fitting to the happiness each of you individually desires as mundane as the mass of you are but I am over this and I am over you... The next time you have need remember the last time you catered to my need and hold your fucking tongue because I'm not listening anymore...xx