A moment to breathe would be beyond nice...

Money is fucking evil... I hate it and I wish there was no need for it... it makes enemies out of nice people...
Besides that... It's a shame it feels like we're losing a friendship we've fought for, for almost two years... it feels like it's falling to the floor... I have fought with you and for you... and I will continue to defend you... but I have been more than hurt from this situation... you say the fight isn't with me yet you've been rubbing things in my face and being vindictive... and you are not the only one hurting right now... you are not the only one who feels betrayed... and you are not the only one who has given to this friendship... emotional or financial support... yet to read your blogs you act like you are the only one giving which is far from the truth... I don't know your motivation building yourself up this way but it's wrong and I won't do the same to you... I know you have contributed I've said that many times in your defense whether the party involved chooses to believe me or not is her and your concern... and I want no part in this fight anymore... it's ridiculous to involve me... I've done what I can and spoke out in your defense I don't know what else to do... at the end of the day my mother owns the house we live in and she has ultimate say... so if you want to convince someone you should go to her... and talk to her as adults instead of blogging back and forth or leaving snotty comments and texting me... I'm not fighting via text it's immature... pick up the phone or talk to me face to face... you are not a victim... no one is against you... you have not been betrayed... I am tired of being emotionally drained so I'm done with it... I'm stepping out of the argument... you just seem to keep forgetting it's not between you and I and the cheap shots and personal jabs are lower than I thought you would sink... you're not that type of person and it hurts... this fucking hurts... not only you but me... but I'm keeping this private where only you I and her can read it I wish you would do the same... this HURTS... fucking hell... I'm not fighting anymore... I'm done...

I love you so fucking much I would die for you... I would do anything to help you... but I'm hurting... and I don't know what else to do...

I didn't get to kiss you... goodbye on the hand...

I'm trying to be nonchalant... but... I miss you... as odd as that sounds... all I ever wanted was to not be strangers... that's it...

Go Go Freedom of Speech...

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/3036713/

I'm not saying I agree with his statements or many others people have made through out our time, but if you're going to fire him then several rap Cd's among other things should be recalled. This world is going to be a grim place when we lose our rights to express ourselves and our opinions. Freedom of Speech means just that Freedom to speak as you so choose... not only have they taken his job but also his rights as an American... a right that has been around longer than we've been alive...

I dread the day...

I've never been so alone and I've... never been so alive...

will the drama ever come to an end... I'm tired... contrary to popular belief I don't like drama... some drama is fun... constant drama is draining... I need an emotional nap as emo ghey as that sounds... I get tired of feeling... and then there are times when I don't feel at all... I wish there was some sort of balance... I think I prefer not feeling at all... what does that say about me?