Emotional Rape

It's what we do...

So after a lovely evening last night I found my way to the hop-in. For various reasons that aren't really important enough to discuss but I ended up talking to Tawf nearly the entire night.
I guess he has a sixth sense and he knew I was doing shitty. Actually the past two week have been ones I should soon like to forget. Moving on. We sat outside and talked for an hour or so and this boy has his head on straight let me tell you. I think he's one of the most amazing people you will ever meet.
He told me there are two types of people in this world. The ones who get hurt and the ass holes. I tend to agree granted sometimes the lines get blurred but for the most part it's exactly right. There are the people who fuck you over and the people who take it. Now the people who fuck you over are people users they are out to get what they want from you then leave you behind. They don't care who they hurt or if they hurt someone. I know several people like this. And the "wastebaskets" care too much and even after you've say stabbed someone in the back they would probably still help you in anyway they can. I know an equal amount of these as well. I've decided I'm not going to be either of these types of people. I'm going to blur the lines and just be me. I said I was too good for this town and everyone in it and he agreed. We were talking about how we hate our jobs how we're too smart to make a career out of mediocre jobs. I thought I was being cocky but he completely agreed with me so it's not cocky it's convinced. He was talking about back home and how it is in a third world country and it made my problems seem like they weren't all that important. They're not. The little drama I'm going threw is nothing and it doesn't make the top ten on my list in the grand scheme of things. We bounced back and forth talking about people and about how the more people I meet the more I lose faith in humanity. It's true about 80% of people are fucking over the rest of the world for me. I'm losing faith. I know there are good, amazing people out there and I truly believe tawf is one of the best but sometimes it's hard to believe there's better out there when you have gotten screwed so much in your life. I still have hope. I don't know this post is already a book long so I guess I will have a part two or whatever.
I think I may go to the cemetery today have some time alone...
Atleast acknowledge that I'm a human and I have emotions it's not cool to treat me like some object, like I'm not even a person. I would never treat someone like they don't exist. I exist God damn it. I'm real, I'm human... maybe you forgot. maybe you don't care... that's a shame...xx