Dreams...

A head to full of thought
you can't use your imagination
like a sky so full of stars
you can't find a constellation

What if you don't know what your dream is? What if you have so many dreams that one can't stand above the rest? I know there is so much I want to do but we're given so little time that I'm not sure I'll be able to do them all. Somedays I feel overwhelmed. I feel like I'm not doing anything with my life. Like I'm trapped. I hate feeling this way. Days when I feel totally unoriginal and meaningless. I think I need a road trip to clear my head. Beth and are are going to take one. I hope it's sooner rather than later. It's funny how getting away from the situation puts it all into perspective. At least I have hopes that it will. One thing I do know is that I'm meant to do more than I'm doing right now. Where I'm currently at isn't going to be my career. I'm far to smart for paper or plastic. I guess that's why I feel trapped. I feel like for the most part I work with a bunch of idiots who probably never even had goals as big as mine. That was mean but some people aren't meant for big things and that's okay if they're happy with their mundane lives let them be. Who am I to say you can do better? What if they started out with goals like mine and got sucked in and trapped. What if they feel the same way I do and they've been there 20 years. I'll be damned if I feel like this any longer than I have. I know the job is temporary I just wish sometimes that it were a little more temporary. I want to be back in school. I feel like I put my life on hold to grow up. I don't know what I was in such a hurry about. It has it's moments don't get me wrong but sometimes I wish I were a kid again. When dreams and possibilities were endless and nothing was out of your reach.
I don't think I want to have kids... Currently. I may change my mind but... I don't know the world's beautiful and wonderful but it's nothing like I thought it would be. There's beauty in every situation. I believe that but sometimes I can't see past what I'm seeing now.
I need a change of scenery...xx